Recently Valerie and I practiced our biggest smiles, swapped out our scrubs for classier outfits, rounded up our three pets, and headed out to a photo session for a family portrait (more on this later). As the squeakers were squeaking and flashbulbs were flashing, I realized that there is a very meaningful way to approach a pet memorial that had never occurred to me.
Considering a world without our pet is so difficult that many of us push the thought out of our minds until it can not be ignored. Such was the case when I didn't even think of the many ways we can begin to create a lasting memorial with our pet right by our side.
As I mentioned in a previous post, the way we memorialize our pets is an important part of navigating the grief process and maintains our connection to them after they have passed. Every individual and family is unique and should create something that speaks directly to them.
If the idea of creating a "living" memorial speaks to you, here are a few ideas to consider!
FAMILY PORTRAITS
(All images in this post were taken and produced by Rich Breshear and his team at Breshear's Professional Photography in Spokane, Washington. Please visit their website - https://www.breshearsphoto.com/ for more info)
The cameras on our phones have perhaps made it all too easy to underestimate the value of professional photography. While our personal images are priceless, a true professional will help you to get the best from your family and produce portraits you will value everyday and be proud to display in your home.
To provide some details on our experience that I mentioned above, I will admit that I had reservations and concerns when we scheduled our photo session. How could this possibly end well?! One of our cats (Total Bilirubin) was very new to us and is very sweet but timid. Our other cat (Shrimp) is very vocal, picky, and one part lap cat, one part vicious predator. Our dog (Maine) is very well behaved other than his need to pee on anything that is vertical and the crazy bursts of energy he gets whenever he meets a new friend.
Walking into the studio, Maine made a bee line to the nearest chair and marked it as his own, despite the fact that I had asked him not to embarrass me. My worst fears were becoming reality. Until they weren't. Rich Breshear saw what had happened (of course!) and his kind approach immediately eased my tension, guilt, and made me feel comfortable.
Choosing the right people to work with is critical for you and your pet's experience and it was clear that we had done just that. Both professional and relaxed, Rich was able to get the best from both Valerie and I, while somehow getting all three of our pets to look directly at the camera. AT THE SAME TIME! The Breshears team was patient, helpful, and fun as they helped us select the specific photos for editing and our final prints.
In the end, the fun we had during the shoot is now a part of the memories that our beautiful portraits represent.
SCRAPBOOKS
Continuing on the theme of photographs, the idea of scrapbooking can be a way of using your favorite selfies, candid photos, and other meaningful items you value into a lasting memorial for your pet. When all of these items are gathered together they can create a beautiful way to remember specific moments, as well as an overall story of the bond that was created, and the love you still share.
There are a multitude of sources you can find through a simple google search if you need ideas or are unsure how to get started. Make it unique and special - it is yours and there is no wrong way to do it!
A scrapbook can always be created in hindsight and be a beautiful way to remember a pet. Making the decision to begin in advance and importantly, dedicating a place to store all of the memories you collect will ensure that nothing is lost along the way, allow you to document important details, and the organization will be invaluable when you are ready to get started on your memorial.
PLANT A TREE
A memorial that lives and grows can be a fulfilling and lasting way to honor a pet. Bring them with you and let them help you select a sapling! Make them a part of the planting process or have them nearby and talk to them as you plant. Visit the newly planted tree with them often and allow those times to become a part of your memories.
You may even choose to spread their ashes or bury them nearby. They will always be remembered as their tree grows and flourishes over time.
CREATE A TRADITION
We are all creatures of habit and the traditions we have can carry powerful memories. Creating a tradition with our pets can be an excellent way to maintain our connection, creating space and focus to reflect on the gratitude and love we will always have for them.
Continuing to walk a favorite path, a special Friday night meal, or visiting their favorite park are only a few small traditions that you can begin now and live with you forever.
There are an unlimited number of ways to honor your pet's memory and create a meaningful way to connect with them. If something speaks to you then it can't be wrong. The important thing is to approach your choice of memorial with intention!
-Will
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